Dear... B.I
You probably don't remember me, and even if you do I don't think I am anything more than a passing thought every once in a while.
You, on the other hand, consume me in waves.
There are spans of time that I don't think of you at all, and then something clicks, and suddenly everything rushes back.
I was sitting in class the other day, when we listened to the human heart beat.
Do you remember when you pulled me into that exhibit, kissing me in the giant heart?
"You know I just had to do it," you would say, smiling.
Do you remember stopping me to slow dance in the middle of the street, under the only street light. You pulled me in close, resting your cheek on the side of my head, your hand slipping into mine as you spun me around like we were frozen in a movie?
Do you remember remember our first date? You showed me all of your neighborhood, stopping at every historical plaque because you knew I liked history?
Do you remember when you got drunk at the beach and wouldn't stop texting me gibberish, and when you woke up you translated it as "___ please talk to me"
Do you remember when we got drunk in the city off of rum and coke, running around the streets under dim lights? Then we went to that fair where I killed you at corn hole, so you picked me up and carried me away.
Do you remember when you told me everything that night? How I told you everything?
Do you remember telling me you wanted to come visit my house again?
Do you remember not responding to my texts after that night?
Do you remember finally answering only when I said that you had to tell me you intended to end things?
Do you remember ending things "August is just too busy I have to end things" as if I really meant that little to you?
I wouldn't be surprised if you don't remember any of it.
But I do, and it all haunts me.
While I have always said that we meet people for a reason, I never understood why I met you. Why my heart had to break, even though it didn't need to. We both knew we had an expiration date, but you couldn't even let me have that closure.
So as I sat in my science class, listening to the heart beat, I felt my own heart hurt a little more, because it's been over two years and I still remember the cologne you wore.