Dear... Derek Shepherd
I never really liked you as a Grey’s Anatomy character. I was fine with you, your relationship with Mer... In fact, I really like MerDer. Grey’s Anatomy completely changed my view on the songs "Chasing Cars" and "How to Save a Life". Grey’s Anatomy changed my view on many things, including death and life. I have even considered doing medicine when I grow up.
Brains confuse me. A lot. Like why am I feeling things I've never felt before? Why over someone I never really liked?
I wasn't really against you, I didn't dislike you, I didn't hate you. You were just there and sometimes I didn't like some of your actions, but those were my personal opinions. I respected you. I still do. I don't know if I want to be a neurosurgeon to find out, or if I don't want to become one so I don't know. Maybe it's better not to become one, not to know. Maybe I'm not even supposed to.
I want to know, but should I know? Why do I not like your death, when I never really liked you in general. Why am I crying? Why am I not okay with it?
It's kind of silly, really. I'm sad about a fictional character. So many people here have suffered much greater things. So I say sorry to them, for my stupid little self being upset over something. Someone. That doesn't even exist. Sorry.