Dear... My Big Brother Who is Disabled
Sometimes it’s hard being a big little sister.
I know you are the most kind and caring person I’ve ever known and I love that about you! You are my joy and my blessing. You truly fill my soul with happiness and I know that you are the sweetest soul ever. But nobody else can feel the pain that I can feel, sometimes I lay in bed and think about my future, but then I remember that there’s still you… it makes me sad that when our parents are gone that you don’t have anyone else but me.
Who is gonna be at your funeral except me? You didn’t deserve this and I know that I don’t deserve this either. I want to be there for you forever but I still want to live my dreams and I know I can’t when I need to take care of you and it breaks my heart that I think that way …. I am so sorry.
I know mom says I don’t need to take care of you in the future but what kind of person does that make me? Mom is so strong for raising you (us) and I know I would’ve lost my mind over the smallest things, so she has got all my respect for that. Sometimes it even breaks me when I need to explain people that we are not blood related but you are still my big brother. I know I am your little sister but I don’t feel like that because I need to raise you and explain to you how cruel the world sometimes can be. You don’t understand that I’m so scared of what comes next and I just want to protect you from all the bad people and bad experiences because you don’t deserve hate.
There is still so much to learn for both of us… I just want to let you know that you’ve saved me in so many ways. I live for you because you just can’t lose your big little sister. I want to give you a better life .