Dear... Everyone
I'm sorry, I'm trying . I know that I'm not the best person I could be but I'm trying.
I'm trying to not let the anger control me. I'm trying to not let the sadness overwhelm me. It's hard and I know it's no one's fault but mine. I could blame my parent's for not being there for me. I could blame the bullies for the things they said. But I know I'm the only one to blame. I could've chose to not let my parent's choice affect me. I could've chosen to ignore the bullies.
I should've worked harder. But I didn't and I have to live with that decision.
I'm sorry for always running when things got hard. I ran when relationships got tough. I ran when I was jealous. I ran when the work was hard. I wish I could say I'd made the decision to stop running but I know that isn't true and I don't wanna lie anymore.
I don't know what the future holds and I don't know if it's gonna be filled with friends and family or more of the sadness that I have become unhealthily comfortable with but I just wanted to say that I'm sorry and I'm trying. I'm trying to make the right decisions. I'm trying to get my life back on track but I don't know if its enough or if it ever will be.
I'm sorry, I'm trying.